Anxious For Summer

Lately, I've been in a mood. I have been aching for nature. I NEED to be outdoors. If I could find a job that would allow me to   just go camping/hiking whenever I wanted, I would be in heaven. Now, there are a few reasons that I am stoked out of my mind for Spring/Summer 2013. Ready?

1: Soldier comes home!!!!!! <3 <3 <3

2: Cruise to Alaska with my cute husband

3: Running away to Moab for a week

4: Testing out my new hiking/outdoors gear

5: Random camping trips

6: Basically, anything and everything that deals with finally being together again.

Christmas present from Soldier! I'm so excited to try them out.
Merrell Moab GTX

MULE NV Hydration Pack. Eventually going to be my early birthday present.

Underneath Delicate Arch for our pre-deployment Anniversary trip.

Pre-deployment Anniversary trip. Cannot wait to go back in May! 

Cruise to Alaska. Kayaking. Hiking. Shaking with excitement!

Come on, sunshine and summertime, get here faster!!

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life long promise to him." ~Anonymous

A Healthy Celebration of Veteran: Emily Walsh

Hello, everyone!! This post is pretty special because I didn't write it. Emily asked me if she could write something for my blog to inform people about little known disorders and diseases that are effecting our beloved military veterans. I was more than honored to have it on here. Please take a moment and read her research. It is very informative and I have already learned a lot that I didn't know before. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did. Thank you, Emily, for striving to bring attention to the health of our veterans!

As we celebrate our veterans, we remember those who have served in our armed forces to secure our freedom. We honor their sacrifices for our country. We also desire them to live a life as healthy as possible since retiring from active duty. 

Despite the desire of the military to reduce the short and long term health risks from military service, veterans provide the medical world with some unique symptoms and diseases. It is important for veterans to follow up on all of their medical appointments, as they are more prone to infectious diseases even with all of the vaccinations that they received during active military service. Chronic muscle pain and injuries especially to the neck and back are common among veterans. The symptoms can be reduced by regular physical exercise to avoid disability.  A healthy diet low in saturated fat and salt will also help veterans and their families to stay healthy. 

Military servicemen exposed to Agent Orange and other herbicides used during the Vietnam War from 1962-1971 are at risk for a variety of symptoms and diseases. These chemical agents can cause fatigue, kidney stones, loss of concentration, Parkinson's, liver dysfunction, cancer, heart disease and shortness of breath. It is challenging dealing with the effects of Agent Orange. The Veterans Health Care system continues to provide benefits to former service men and women. The VA department has a comprehensive program for those with service related symptoms and medical conditions from Agent Orange including disability compensation, health care services, scientific research, outreach and education.

Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) often occurs following a life-threatening event such as military service. It takes time and good psychiatric care to recover from the emotional and psychological effects of war. Stress management, suicide prevention, alcohol and substance abuse are all a concern to the military. The support of family and friends is crucial to cope with recovery and adjusting to a life after military service. 

An especially devastating injury to both military personnel and their family is traumatic brain injury (TBI) caused by a jolt or blow to the head bringing on disrupted brain function, headaches and memory loss. This injury and leg or arm amputations involve a lot of rehabilitation for the veteran to cope with and return to living as much of a normal life as possible. Advancements in medical prosthesis have been made in recent years that provide for improved functioning and mobility. 

Exposure to asbestos in the 1930s to 1970s has put veterans at risk for mesothelioma cancer. As the asbestos fibers build up in the body, it triggers physiological changes that can lead to mesothelioma that is a tumor in tissue covering the lung or the lining of the abdominal cavities. There are VA benefits for veterans diagnosed with mesothelioma.

The American spirit lives on in our veterans and military families. Their patriotism inspires us to hope for a better future for our country. 

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Drumroll please...

On August 9th, I started going to Crossfit Fanatics in West Jordan. I have lost 15 lbs since July 13th WOOHOO! Because of this, several of my friends asked me to post before and after photos onto Facebook. Yeah right. Even though this blog is 100% public, I feel like it will be seen less this way so, without further ado, I give you my before and "so far" shots. Please ignore the garbage in the bathroom.

The end of August 2012 

December 5, 2012

The end of August 2012 

December 5, 2012

There you have it. As of December 5th, I weigh 170 lbs. My legs are a lot thinner, I'm toning up (you can see my ribs in the after shots), I feel great! I also didn't realize, until I saw these photos, that I naturally stand a lot straighter now. This is after 4 months at Crossfit and I have 4 more months to reach my goal! You will have another update in April. I'm going to be going back on my GF/AF/SF diet so that my insides will stop hating me. That will definitely help me continue to tone up.

One thing that I am proud of and am continuing to improve is my strength. When I'm not having asthma, I can dead lift 150lbs. When I first started, I could only dead lift 105lbs! My endurance is increasing and I am loving the opportunity to challenge myself to go further than the time before.

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

You know you're an adult when...

Why hello! I haven't seen your face in a while. Lots has been going on in my world the last few weeks but the most recent just happens to be that I discovered what it's like to be an adult this morning.

For a long time I have had a dream about opening up an equine therapy camp for veterans with PTSD. It was going to be huge. There was so much going to go into it that I would have to write a whole different post in order to tell you. Today, it hit me that this was a selfish dream. Yes, it could help SO many soldiers and I am so passionate about it but...it would put my marriage and family at risk. All of our time would be spent on the business and my family would have to come second to it. I'm not willing to do that so I decided, for the sake of my current and future family, that dream needs to come to an abrupt end. It would have been amazing to help all of those selfless vets but military life is stressful enough on a family without adding "try to keep a business alive" on top of it.

That was my moment today. Now, I'm back at square one trying to figure out what I want to do with my life. I might just finish my AS this semester and then continue to advance as a phlebotomist. It's really not a bad career path and I have loved doing it the last year. We shall see...

 

***UPDATE***

I know...I'm bipolar or something. I'm still wondering what to do but I don't want to end my dream. My family will always come first but these veterans need someone who will fight for them. They need someone who is going to help them overcome such a hard disorder. I'm not ending my dream, it's just on hold for a little while.

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Inspirational: From Lyndsay's Letter

"James 1:5 is almost at the end of the Bible. Joseph Smith had to read all the way til there to find his answer--but it came! Likewise, sometimes we have to wait and search and wait some more--but the answers always come. Trust in the Lord that He will fulfill His promises--in His due time :)"

I love her. This is what I needed to read today. Just because I don't have an answer yet, does not mean that it isn't coming. I just have to be patient and wait for the time when the Lord knows that I am ready for the answer.

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Photo time

"Straight is the Gate" by Robert A. Boyd

Today, I lost my volunteer shirt so I couldn't go volunteer. My "boss" only works M-F so I couldn't just ask for a new one either. I decided to go to choir practice instead (which we all found out was cancelled 20 minutes after it was supposed to start). My ward choir meets in the institute building that is in the church parking lot. In the classroom there was this photo and I couldn't take my eyes off of it. I fell in love with it right away. I searched the interwebs and finally found it. It is among my favorite pictures of the SLC temple that I have ever seen. I'm debating on saving up my pennies and buying it for my home for Christmas. Ordering it on canvas...that would put such a beautiful spirit into the house.

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Progress

At the beginning of October, I got a phone call from my Angel. It was a really short one but we got to pray together...it was amazing. I felt so much peace that I hadn't felt in weeks. Before we prayed, we decided that we were going to read one chapter in the Book of Mormon every day until he got home. That way, it would be like we were reading it together and we would feel closer to each other. We would also be growing in the ways that matter most. We are going to save the last chapter for the day he gets home and read it together. After we are completely finished, we'll follow Moroni's advice and pray about it.

I'm keeping a chart on my bedroom wall so that I can keep track of where we need to be. He has been great with reading everyday. I, on the other hand, have sucked it up. I thought I only missed a day or two but it turns out that I am a week behind him. I'm working on it lol. I'm catching up to him. He is so...much better than I am but I'm trying.

The first week that we started that was amazing! Everything that would have normally driven me mad just rolled off my back like the duck that I am(that's a story for a completely different time). The gospel of Jesus Christ is such a blessing to have in my life. No matter what is going on in my life, there is a huge sense of peace when I follow the commandments. Having someone who shares this love with me? The best blessing I could have asked for.

"Army Wife: It's not my status, it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

I'm...not sure

Well, I am not sure what to write today. I have had this nagging in the back of my head for a while now...I just feel like I need to write. Whether or not I actually publish this is an entirely different matter.

The last week or two has been difficult and when I find myself getting down I have to stop whatever I'm doing, take a deep breath, and count. No, not 1...2...3... I'm counting months. It has been almost 27 months (next week) since my soldier and I got married. It has been 17 months since we moved to SLC from Logan. In 3 weeks, I will have been at my current job for a year and we will have had our dog, Jax for 2 years. I have been living in our current house for almost 6 months. I graduated from high school 3 1/2 years ago. Time does pass. It is always moving and it is, most definitely, not stopped right now. Yes, it feels like I'm stuck in time but then I remember things that happened a while ago. It helps me remember that, soon, the deployment will be on my list of "so many months ago...Soulmate was deployed."

I have this problem and I've known about it for a really long time. Today, in Sunday School, one of the verses of scripture we read was Matthew 7:3-5. It talks about how we are hypocrites because we view the mote in our brother's eye but cannot see the beam that is in our own. Now, I have been trying and trying to not judge others because it is not my place. Being human, I fail on a constant basis but this lesson...this lesson today really hit me hard. I have more flaws than I would ever care to admit and I have no room to do anything but show love for all of God's children. I wish that I could be more Christlike and I'm trying.

The last thing about this post that I think is important is:

I don't know how I won the heart of such an amazing man. Zach is everything that I'm not. He is everything that I need. Even from 7338 miles away, he knows exactly what to say to make everything ok. He knows when I'm upset even when I think I'm doing an awesome job at hiding it. He knows every little thing about me and loves me anyways. My flaws and oddities don't scare him away...he says that they make him love me even more. Every day that he is gone, my love for him grows more than I knew possible. How can such a tiny muscle in your body, hold so much? How can it be constantly expanding to hold more and, yet, remain the same size? This man...Oh, this man. He is my rock. He gives me strength when I don't think that I can go on. He has always encouraged me in everything that I do. He has always seen the beauty that is within me, even when I can't see anything. He keeps me in check when I'm about to go too far...he pushes me when I don't go far enough. I love him. I can honestly say that I am terrified of who I would be if he had never come into my life. Before I met him, I was in such a bad place. Then along came this  amazing, wonderful stranger who made me fall head-over-heels in love with him. I will forever be grateful to my Father in Heaven for sending him to me. I know that when he made Zach he was thinking about how he was going to save me one day. If you're, somehow, reading this...I will love you until the end of Eternity.

"Army Wife: It's not my status, it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Quotable: Pooh and Piglet

"What day is it?"

"It's today," squeaked Piglet.

"My favorite day," said Pooh.

I love this quote so much! After reading it, I decided that I would never let one day pass that wasn't my favorite day. Even if EVERYTHING goes wrong, I can always find something to be grateful for that will make it my favorite day yet. 

Today is my favorite day because Zach called me. I was in a really crappy service zone so he couldn't hear me, but I got to hear him. He told me that he loves me. That is all that I need to make it through today.

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's a life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Secrets, secrets are...so. much. fun.

Wanna know a secret? It's a juicy one.

*****************************************************************

I. Love. My. Body.

*gasp* "She said what??" I know! We are programed to HATE ourselves! At least, that's what I thought for YEARS! I hated everything about me. I couldn't see why Husband would love me so much. He thought that I was perfect. Yes, he would encourage me to exercise with him but he always made sure that I knew, "I love you no matter what. You are the most beautiful woman I have ever met!" Psh....yeah right ;)

Well, since he deployed I've made it a goal to get back down to my DS College weight (DS was my first college away from home. I weighed 140) and get tone! I have never been tone. I know, that's EVERY Deployed Wife's goal! "Ooooh, I'm gonna get fit for the husband" and then they never do it! I was one of them.

On August 9th, I kicked it into gear. A few weeks before, I had learned about this thing called Crossfit...it looked so scary! August 9th was the day I tried it out for the first time. I also started going back on my diet (see my post about the diet. Should be around October 2011). Because of this awesomeness I have gone from 180.3 on Aug. 9th, to 170.0 today! Less than a month later!

The love of my body started 4 days after starting Crossfit. I noticed a tiny change and that was awesome. This morning I looked in the mirror at my much skinnier self, ran downstairs to the scale, almost passed out from pure shock, and got dressed for another awesome work out!

I forgot to get my inches measurement today but I know that I have lost at least 1 inch because my pants don't fit...even with a belt on.

This has been SUCH an inspiring experience for me! I hate exercising more than any person I know and if I can do it, so can you! 

I will probably post a few of the quotes that have helped keep me going at a later date. Until then, here is the one that helped me go today. 

"Never quit. Because when you see someone fight that hard, it makes life seem pretty easy. The more you give, the more you realize how easy life really is. Pain is temporary, but quitting lasts forever."
- U.S. Navy SEAL Unknown

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Putting It Into Perspective

Here is a song that my sweet friend, Sabrina, posted. So far, on this deployment journey I have: completely broken down in front of my math teacher, gotten about 4 hours of sleep every night, am []this close to failing my classes this semester because I can't focus, I have pasted that fake smile for the world to see while I'm at work, I deal with the "Oh, I totally understand! I've seen Army Wives!" and the "Oh. THAT'S his job? He's safe." people, and, through the Lord, have become stronger than I ever knew possible. 

However, through this whole experience (other than praying for their safety) I have been so selfish! I thought that this experience wasn't hard on the soldiers "because they trained for it". I thought that I was the only one hurting. I know that it is hard for them, but I was only thinking of myself. After Sabrina posted this song, my view on this did a complete 180. I need the rest of you military wives/girlfriends/husbands/families out there to see that it isn't easy on them either. They didn't want to leave us...they had to. This song made me love my soldier so much more than I did before. It made me see how hard it was for him to say goodbye again...but he did it because it was asked of him. He is among the most selfless men I have ever met and I am so grateful that we have this life together. Yes, it's hard, but I wouldn't change one second of what we have together. 

So, without further ado, I give you...

Memphis May Fire-- Miles Away

"Army Wife: It's not my status; it's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Stand in Holy Places

Tonight, I am half a world away from the man I love. I hurt in places I never knew existed...all because we are apart. Tonight, I didn't pray for comfort like I should have but the Lord knew exactly what I needed. He took pity on me and gave me His comfort and love even when I did not deserve it. Tonight, I am at peace. I know that everything will be ok. I know that my angel will come home to me. Tonight, the Lord heard my heart crying out to Him and answered me.

I thought I understood what people were talking about when they would say, "He hears and answers every prayer." But, until now, I had no idea. EVERY prayer. The one that I didn't say...the one that I didn't even know that my heart was screaming out. He answered me. He knows me. He loves me. Heavenly Father knew what I needed tonight and came to my rescue. His arms wrapped around me and my tears ceased, my fears subsided, and my heart was no longer troubled. 

I cannot express how grateful I am to Him for calming me down tonight. There are people around me that I can complain to but I don't, 90% of the time. They don't need to be burdened with my pain. And, honestly, I feel like they don't understand. Even the wives who are going through it with me. We are all experiencing the same deployment and a completely different deployment all at the same time. They don't know EXACTLY how I am feeling so I choose not to complain to them most the time. They have their own pain. However, HE knows my pain. He knows, right down to the last little ache. He knows exactly what I am going through right now. I love the Lord with all my heart. ...it just took me a little while to remember that He is always there if I only cry out to Him.

During all of this, I found an old song that I haven't heard in years. It brought me so much peace that I need to share it for those who need peace as well. Like the song says, "I stand in holy places, and I will not move until the Captain comes and says well done. He is the hope I hold on to." I will get through this deployment because I am holding onto Him the entire way. He gives me peace when I have none. He gives me the strength to get out of bed each day. He sends Zach's love to me when I need it most.

Tonight...I stand in holy places. I will hold on until He comes and tells me that I've done well. I will hold on until Zach comes back to me safely.

In a sea shifting values
Tossed on every wave
While the winds wail around me
I will not be afraid
To call out for my captain
To calm the waves in me
When I stand a little taller
Its only then I finally see

I stand in holy places
Protected from the storm
Anchored safe in harbor
Though my sails are ripped and worn
I stand in holy places
And I will not move
Until the Captain comes
And says Well done
He is the hope I hold on to
In holy places

There is a harbor in His holy house
An anchor in His grace
That steadies in the waves of doubt
And in every holy place
No matter where I travel
His spirits guiding me
With the Lord as my captain
There is a peaceful port in me

I stand in holy places
Protected from the storm
Anchored safe in harbor
Though my sails are ripped and worn
I stand in holy places
And I will not move
Until the Lord has come
And says well done
He is the hope I hold on to

I stand in holy places
Protected from the storm
Anchored safe in harbor
Though my sails are ripped and worn
I stand in holy places
And I will not move
Until the Lord has come 
And says well done
He is the hope I hold on to
In holy places

Holy places

"Army Wife: It's not my status. It's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Oh, How I Love the Wives

I've got insomnia. I tried to sleep but I couldn't without posting this. It kept nagging and nagging until I turned my computer back on. Because of how tired I am, it will just be short.

When we first heard about the deployment, I thought I could get through it alone. I thought that I would be strong enough to not need anyone else.

**I have never been more wrong**

Because of this deployment, there was a group made on Facebook for the spouses and families of the deploying soldiers. 

Best. Idea. Ever. 

It originally started out as a bunch of strangers with a similar hurdle to jump. Then, the admin shared her story which got everyone else to share as well. As more people began sharing, I noticed that we all started talking more and planning to see each other more. The people in Logan found each other, Idaho found each other, etc. and we became each others support. 

Over the last few weeks these amazing women have gone from being complete strangers to me, to being sisters. When I've had a bad day, they make me laugh until I want to pee my pants. When I'm missing my husband, they're there to let me cry. When I need someone to stop me from buying too much for my husband's birthday, they are there to encourage me to buy more! 

I am grateful for this deployment for so many reasons...but today, it's because it brought us together. If it wasn't for the deployment, I wouldn't know these women and I wouldn't have their strength rubbing off on me each day. The days when I feel weak they pick me up and help me keep going.

I love these ladies more every time I get on the computer. They are all so strong and so brave. They help me know that no matter what, we are sisters and nothing will change that. I don't think I will be able to repay them for what they have done for me so far (not to mention what I know they will do for me over the next year). MK was absolutely right. I am completely still in debt to her! ;) as well as the rest of them.

"Army Wife: It's not my status. It's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Embrace the Suck

Today....

Today straight up sucked.

Yes, marrying a soldier you know what you're getting into; but does that make it hurt any less? Nope. I think it makes it worse because it's constantly in the back of your mind. Knowing that one day, the man you love more than life itself is going to be called up by his country, for God only knows how long, to a country that you've only heard stories about. They prepare for this from day one. THIS is why they joined the military in the first place! They're trained for this!

****We're not****

We're not trained for what to do at home while he's off fighting a war. But we deal...and we stay "Army Strong" because we love them. We take it one day at a time and hope that the next day we get a little stronger. At least, that's what I think--that's what I hope. "You never know how strong you are until you don't have any other choice." Status: True. Today, I start my journey to find out just how strong I really am. 

Today is the official day 1 for me. I woke up at 5:18 and couldn't get back to sleep. That's ok with me, though. It gave me 20 minutes to just watch him sleep. Out the door at 6:30...that's the Army for ya...hurry up and wait. I'm glad we got that extra hour before things got crowded. It was nice to have that time, relatively, alone. 

I didn't think that anyone in our family was going to be able to make it but my two wonderful sisters, Tawna and Ta'Mera, and their families drove for over an hour just to see him off. It meant so much to him to have that support. I am so grateful that they sacrificed so much to make it this morning. I don't think I could have gotten through it without them there.

Phoenix and Maddox LOVED looking at the planes. Maddox thought it was so cool that there were so many soldiers around. I got a text from Ta'Mera later saying, "Wow! Uncle Zach is an Army guy!"~Maddox. Apparently he didn't know. But they sure love their Uncle Zach...they also love the cookies and donuts that they got when they walked into the hangar. 

Listening to the commanders talk to the troops and families. One soldier proposed to his girlfriend! So bittersweet. 

Lennox stopped crying for all of two seconds JUST for this photo! I felt so lucky. The poor baby just wanted to eat not get his picture taken!

Zach picked up Phoenix and she latched onto him like it was life or death. They stayed like this for several minutes. The only thing that got her to let go of him was Maddox grabbing her leg and pulling as hard as he could :)

Last goodbye. This is when I knew that it was finally hitting Zach too. He grabbed me and wouldn't let go. It wasn't a normal hug...it was an "I'm going to miss you so much" hug. I hated this moment...I didn't want to let go. 

:'( This is it...the last time I get to see his face. This was a lot louder than the video shows...it was a really cool second. So...hard to handle. 

:'( There he goes. I love you, Zach! Oh, so many tears.

I am so proud of my soldier...so proud of the entire 624th! Stay safe and return with honor, soldiers. You make us all so proud to be Army Families.

"Army Wife: It's not my status. It's my life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

"A Soldier's Song"--Jessica Frech

I just want to share this song with everyone. It's such a beautiful tribute to our troops. It's a little long because she talks at the beginning and the end but it's worth it. If you want, the lyrics are below. 

They walked through the door and onto the plane waving Goodbye with their hands

They spent the last year coping with fear that their children Would understand

And as one looked around

He swallowed his pride down

This is why we're here

We'll all leave below a blue sky traveling side by side

We'll all leave with our heads held high we know the road that lies

We'll go and serve

And with honor we'll return

They lost quite a few along the way but brought them together the same

From assignment to assignment and mission to mission this is why they came

And as one looked around

He made it to solid ground

This is why we're here

We'll all leave below a blue sky traveling side by side

We'll all leave with our heads held high we know the road that lies

We'll go and serve

And with honor we'll return

We'll all leave with our heads held high we know the road that lies

We'll all leave below a blue sky traveling side by side

We'll all leave with our heads held high we know the road that lies

We'll go and serve

And with honor we'll return

"Army Wife: It's not a status. It's a life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

Lovin' on this man

The last time we were at his parents house for family dinner, he was late. He walked in in his ACU's and our niece, Kodie (2 1/2 years old), looked up from her dinner and said, "*gasp* There's my super hero!" She had never done anything like that before. Zach still wishes that someone had taped her saying it because he thought that she didn't like him. The rest of the day, she dragged him around the house showing him "monsters" in Jordan's room and playing with the laser pen she found. She climbed on his lap when it was time for dessert and wouldn't leave his side. It was the most adorable thing I have ever seen. <3

Not only is he her super hero...he is my hero too. 

A while back we had family pictures taken, here are a few.

I know this is corny, but he really is the rock that gets me through the hard times. I don't know who I would be without him and his never-ending love for me. I am so grateful for his willingness to sacrifice everything he has and is to go fight for a people that he doesn't know. All he knows is that they are God's children and they need help. 

It's moments like this where I can't even describe how proud of him I am.

"Army Wife: It's not a status. It's a life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous

...with a little bit of Insanity thrown on top

Prologue: I may write 2-3 today because I have SO much to catch up on! 

So...the day has come and gone. Zach left about a month ago. I will get to see him fly out to Afghanistan sometime in the next month and a half but until then...he's states away. I'm surprisingly ok with it. I keep myself busy enough that by the time I get home at night I'm not exhausted to think about the "what if's". 

The other day, we had family day at Camp Williams and I was talking to a retired wife who told me, 

"The first two months are going to feel like he's a training. You'll know he's deployed but sub-consciously you think he's coming home, so you don't get sad. It's that first day of month 3 that is when it's the hardest."

Yay!!!!.... O.o .... I've got a while before it hits then. I'm expecting it'll hit as I'm watching his plane fly out but who knows. It might not even hit me until he comes home. I've heard of wives having that experience.  Anyways, the point is, I tried to avoid it, but it came. Now is the test for how strong I really am.

That also leads into what the title means :) I'm pretty excited about it. One of the goals of every Army Wife going through a deployment is this: I need to lose weight so I can look my best when he gets home!! 

Does it ever happen? Not often. They start but they don't keep it up. This is why my goal isn't for weight. I couldn't care less about what I weigh. In fact, I got rid of my scale. My deployment goal is to finish....wait for it.....

****INSANITY****

For those who don't know what it is, it's a kick-your-butt P90X on steroids. It gives you the results that you've been working for for 3 years straight, all in 60 days. I just finished day 1 yesterday, I am SO sore and I LOVE it!!

My doctor told me that I needed to do something extreme for my PCOS. Is this extreme enough? lol. :)I'll post my stats as I go along...in a different post than this one because I can't find the ones from yesterday.

"Army Wife: It's not a status. It's a life-long promise to him." ~Anonymous